“The Monster Doesn’t Sleep Under Their Bed, It Scream Inside Their Head.”
— Unknown
This blog comes straight from the heart and is dedicated to anyone who has pre-teens or teenagers. The journey of parenting a teen is far different than the generation I grew up in. This is a little piece of how I feel when dealing with the hardships of being a parent of a teen. At times we may not know the exact monsters our children are facing. If we do not know what they are facing, neither do they!
This may sound chaotic, however, this is what and how I was feeling at the time of writing this.
Thank you for giving it a chance!
Scared Of The Unknown
As we sat in therapy not knowing what to expect. I was scared. What were we all going to say? I thought I had my family all packed into a well-running car of life, and to find out that the seatbelt hadn’t been put on one of my children. How does this happen? It was something so small I didn’t even notice, but has impacted my child’s life.
All the time the kids sit in their rooms as teenagers do. I often check on them to be sure they are not rummaging the internet for bad stuff. Most of the time I know the game they are playing, or it is some TIK-TOK video or drawing lesson of some sort. What was said didn’t have to do with the computer screen at all. It was a mask to cover emotions.
When talking to my children, I always try my best to have an open dialog. They can tell me anything without repercussions. I know my face at times can be not so subtle, but I do try. My goal in life is to always let my children come to me. Even if I bring on discussions for deeper conversations. No one knows the truths that teenagers hide.
All those times my children sat in the dark in their rooms, there was this little monster standing behind them. All that time, I never even noticed. On the outside, they seem fine, but it isn’t what is on the outside that matters. It is the monster waiting, attached to them… All it took was one sad news, add a bully my child wanted to be friends with, and that monster grew.
Exposing The Teen’s Monster
It isn’t too late! That monster is about to be exposed for what it truly is. Little by little it will come to light, and I will be waiting on the other side, in the light for my child to come back to me. I can already see their feet starting to move.
It is strange how a person can hide such monsters. From the outside, everything seems fine. Then one day it slowly lurks around the corner, and what most of us see is a tired person. We think it is from external factors, when in fact, it truly isn’t. It is that monster bearing down on that person, telling them how to behave, what do to, and slowly taking bites of them. All the while the person is fighting, but it buries its claws deep, and that fight can be life or death.
Let Them Know You Are There
I have always said we can not protect our children 100%, but we can be there for them. Look for the signs, open dialog, teach them how the world works, and try to notice the small things they do not. Parents, today, give your kid a hug, a compliment, and words of encouragement because you don’t always know what they are hiding. Even if nothing seems to have gone bad for them, you don’t know for sure. Kids, especially teenagers, while trying to find themselves are great at hiding. Even if your child is grown up, check on them. In all aspects of life, the monster still lurks waiting for one scrap and then clings on until we burn it off, but it never dies.
Check out my friend Maggie’s article: The Advocate Mom: The Best Advocate.
Do you or have you had teenagers? Were the experiences great or were their struggles?
If you would like to share, please send me a message via the contact page or leave me a message on my Instagram.